Natalie, the moronster!

Here I go - my first real post on my first real blog. Really, this isn't so much as divine inspiration as much as it is a desire to put off the inevitable - final paper for my qualitative methods class.

That said I actually am finding myself curious about this season of Survivor. Last Thursday’s episode really got me going. Natalie, one of the Fans on this season's themed "Fans vs. Favorites" (for a nice recap of this season's premise, go here), has emerged as a total moronster (that is moron and monster combined - yup, a total makey-uppy!). I found her antics last night despicable. So much so that during the program I paused it (DVR is the best) and turned to my boyfriend and said "I hate her!" I don't like interrupting my Survivor viewing experience, so this was a big deal. I usually understand the angles people use to win people over; I'm more than familiar with the morally ambiguous alliances and back stabbings; what I am not as familiar with is the moronster that has unfolded in one episode before my very eyes.

Up until this point Natalie was a non-issue character. She was there, in all of her boob-y green string bikini glory, but never much of a key player. In fact, the only thing going for her that I saw was her inclusion in Parvati's all-girl alliance (that is a whole other post in and of itself!). So, let me take you, then, to the point in the game when Natalie went from a hanger-on to a legend in her own mind...

Towards the beginning of the episode we find our Survivors at the "auction" (one of the BF's favorite ongoing portions of this show). In this particular auction, Natalie doesn't appear to be faring too well. She spends a whopping $240 of her $500 on a bowl of "Bat soup" - which James has no shame and eats that nastiness right up! Protein! So, foolishly, Natalie goes for another auction item, which is worth to her another $240! When Host Probst reveals the treasure she bought, it is a bottle. At first I thought it would be another "native delicacy," but instead there was a message which told Moronster that she could send anyone she wished to Exile Island and take his/her money as they were to leave immediately. She chose Jason, well, because she hates him, wants him gone, blah, blah, blah. This is important because Jason gives her credit for a masterful plan saying that she knew he'd be able to find it and finally he can be part of an alliance.

While Jason is kicking some major arse finding the immunity idol, everyone else is plotting Jason's demise. The women have created a ironclad alliance (all the better to crumble down later!) and it seems that if Jason plays his idol then James is going to be the third member of the jury.

Ok, now that we've got some background - let's get to the moronster part. So, Jason makes it clear that he trusts Natalie and Cirie (the true brains in this operation and NOT Parvati) nudges Natalie to play that trust and make Jason think he's safe. So, here's the grotesque part - Natalie makes it like she came up with all of this on her own. Clearly if you watch this, it is Cirie that is coming up with all of these tactics. Natalie proceeds to get extremely excited about misleading Jason and "blind-siding" another character. She then takes Jason aside to say sending him to Exile Island was exactly what she intended, and then Jason pledges his allegiance to her. I just was cringing when he told her how smart she was. Ugh! And lest you think that she was just playing her cards right, we are subjected to her nonsensical speech in which she clearly takes full credit for what is about to go down – Biggie Blindside #2.

Here’s what she said:
“I think I can be pretty evil. I am in I will get you mode. I am having a lot more fun. I am getting to be more of myself, which is proving to be pretty ruthless and pretty stone cold bitch and pretty cutthroat bitch and I have a smile on my face. Sorry about that.”

Oye vey! I hated this speech. She's just awful. Not that I am a huge Jason fan, and not that I think people ever truly play with integrity, BUT, she is truly gross. This other part of the speech was particularly grotesque:

“I would love to blindside Jason, just go for his jugular, floss my teeth with his jugular.”

Seriously? Can one floss with a jugular? That’s just nasty.

So, there we have, Natalie the Moronster. Gross and evil combined with pure moron. I am hoping in the weeks to come we see our heroine Cirie rise as the Survivor mastermind that she is and she plucks these girls off one by one and flosses with all their collective jugulars!

Anyway, my first post became a rant about Natalie. My apologies, but I think it speaks to a bigger issue that I am having with this season and perhaps the subject of my next post: hyper-awareness of making yourself a celebrity in the midst of the game.

Although, as my friend Jenn was saying to me today: when did Survivor get so good?! It has been a great season, so I look forward to posting again! Feel free to leave comments and thanks for reading!

Hello everyone and welcome!

Although trying to fight it, I decided that I need to start a blog to record my musings and ramblings on reality television and popular culture. So, here it is! Since it is the end of the semester I won't be able to do much except say hello and introduce myself but be assured that come May 5th this blog will be up and running. So, welcome, have a peak at my profile and until May 5th, be well!